Grace, Strength, and Trials: What I learned from losing a spelling bee

I was talking with a friend earlier today. She felt so weak. She felt like she had failed at some decisions in the past, and thereby was suffering today. Maybe that was true, but I'd like to share an experience with you that I told her about.

In 5th and 6th grades, I participated in the school spelling bee. 5th grade was my first time ever making it to a school level, and I was so excited and nervous. I studied like crazy. I memorized the words. I knew it front and back. And then...I got sick. The stress built up until it emerged as a fuzzy head, bad cold, and congested nose. Bleh. You know what I mean?
Well, I went to the competition anyway. There were probably 30 students. I was one of the first to spell in the first round. And the word came. I don't even know what the word was, but I was so sick and stressed that I missed it. On the first round, I lost. I got last place. I bawled my face off and drenched my jacket in boogs and tears. I was a mess.

The next year, I returned to the spelling bee. This time there were only 15 students, I'm guessing. I had prepared equally, but this time I was not sick. And ya know what - I got 5th/6th tied and made it through quite a few rounds. Wahoo!

Well, why did I share that story with my friend and now with you? An embarrassing story that involved me failing the spelling bee & having to fess up to my favorite teacher and my large class that I slaughtered the spelling bee (and not in a pleasant way)? Well, this is why.

Many times, we walk into a situation as prepared as we can be. We all have our limitations, and we try our best. We step up (figuratively) to the mic & look the judges square in the eye and watch their mouths as they say the word. And then somehow, despite all we've done, we fail. We collapse. Perhaps we even break down and vow to never step up to the mic again. We feel pointless, worthless, and like something nobody would ever care to claim.
In that moment, we may ask God why He let us fail. Why does someone who loves us so much let us get last place??
There are many reasons. Perhaps it is to chastise us. Perhaps it is a warning. Perhaps it is His way of helping us embrace Him and Christ's grace. Perhaps it is a way to open our hearts to future opportunities and exquisite joy.

My friends, overall, you will often not be strong enough. God really does give us challenges that are beyond our scope. Despite all our preparation and the hours we spend looking at a list of a couple hundred words, we are not enough. We've got limitations (like my sickness) that keep us from fulfilling our dreams.
Luckily, Christ is strong enough. Ask Him for that strength. Ask Him for the help to forgive, to aid, to lift, and to try again. And often, His strength may not be used in order to help you get 1st place the first time, but perhaps just to help you be strong enough to try again. Maybe you'll never get 1st. But that isn't the point in this life. This life is about learning how to love, to lift, and to become like Him, and ultimately to learn how to humbly accept help and chastisement.

Don't give up. Don't think you are weak because you fell the first time. Don't think God doesn't love you just because you didn't score first or because you scored last. Simply know that He is all wise and that Christ's grace is sufficient for all of us. Ultimately, it is strong enough to take "the loser" and turn them into "a winner", or at least give them the strength to try again and again.
No one is a loser in His sight.
Grace: It's not just there to mend sins. It's there to mend will.

In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
-Julie